LIFESTYLE: When your partner is a musician
May 24, 2019 Feather Casilan
Have you ever wondered what it’s like dating a musician? Or been there, done that? Well, let’s talk about what it’s like when your partner is a musician!
When dating anyone, there will always be pros and cons and different kinds of experiences. But have you ever wondered what it’s like if your partner is a musician, be it a solo artist or someone from a band? Well, I asked around (and witnessed a lot). So I’m gonna share with you guys what’s it’s like when your partner is a musician!
The pros of dating a musician
They’ll swoon you with their talent
Isn’t it amazing looking at someone you love and seeing how captivatingly talented they are? Whether they are practicing or performing, it’s as if they are the most talented person you’ve laid your eyes on. Especially when they share that talent with you.
I never dated a musician. But I could only imagine how one would feel watching them perform and looking at you as if you’re that one good thing amidst the crowd. And of course, witnessing their hard work and sleepless nights turning into a beautiful set. Booming with pride for your significant other.
You’ll be one of the first to listen to their songs
One of the perks of dating a musician, you’ll be one of the first few to hear their new song! Even better, you may even be part of the entire songwriting process or music making in the first place. You’d witness how something from scratch can turn into a beautifully woven masterpiece. And maybe, just maybe, the song is all about you! If that can’t make you grin from ear to ear, I don’t know what will.
Whole new experiences each time
With whomever you are with, there will be brand new experiences. With a musician, on the other hand, that means going to a lot of gigs, events, and concerts. Not only will you see your partner living out their dream and being heard by people, but you would also get to witness other artists doing the same.
And who wouldn’t love to discover new music and find new friends in the world of their partner, right? Not only do you have a relationship with your partner, but you’ll most probably build one with their bandmates or music friends! They come in a package deal you know. Each set they play at different places are memories you’d be able to keep in your pocket. Plus, showing them how much you support them will definitely be fulfilling.
The cons of dating a musician
But of course, just like with dating anyone, there will always be cons. Despite all the swoon-worthy moments and the amazing music accompanying it, there are also obstacles that come along when you are dating a musician. What are those? Let’s find out!
Everyone is on to you… (Kidding? Actually not.)
Whether your partner is starting out or they are known in the music scene already, be ready because people will honestly be on to you. It’s not a shocking realization that people like to gossip or talk about others especially if they are associated with someone who is making a name for themselves. And well, some people really don’t seem to have bigger things to do besides judging or scrutinizing.
That’s why being the boyfriend/girlfriend, eyes will be glued to your looks and your every move. I know a lot of people who go through this merely because they are the significant other. But keep your head high and don’t be fazed! Let them be. People will always have something to say. If you ignore them, they’d most likely get tired and go away anyways.
Jealousy is one of your biggest enemies
Your partner will be at the limelight. And let’s face it that when a person is talented, it can’t be helped that there would be admirers out there. Some would simply admire them and maybe post a few stuff about them every now and then. While some may go a bit overboard and even try to slide into their inbox. During gigs, they’d ask for photos, have some chitchat, and you’ll find your partner entertaining them. But don’t be too bothered as long as you know that they are faithful to you.
As an artist, your partner would entertain them but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re doing something disloyal. Those are his/her fans anyhow. I get if you feel territorial and possessive, that’s your bae after all. At the end of the night, however, remind yourself that you know that this kind of string is going to be attached to them. Don’t let your psycho tendencies get in the way of your relationship and your partner’s passion. Be understanding, have faith, and make sure that trust is in place in order for your relationship to work. Musicians are ultimate crushies, that’s why you’re head over heels after all (lol)!
You have to be patient. Not everyone’s strongest suit right?
Canceled dates. Busy schedule. Gigs, gigs, gigs. I know I’ve said that gigs, events, and concerts are experiences truly one for the books. But still, everyone wants time with their partner. However, there are circumstances that dates are mostly gig dates. That’s great too. But gig dates also mean that your partner is busy bridging connections, maintaining friendships in the music scene, and exhausted from their set. Not exactly a date, is it? That’s why you have to be patient. This applies to everyone, no matter what the job or passion of your partner is. We all gotta hustle for that dream and as their significant other, we have to support them the way they support us.
Be patient. No matter how busy you guys may be and no matter how tough things can be at times when you’re both reaching your goals, as long as your relationship has a good foundation, then understanding should come naturally. Passion, career, and love may be a tough blend. If you really love each other, then patience, trust, understanding, and communication shouldn’t be a problem despite the circumstances. Remember, you chose to date a musician so don’t go whining on them regarding what they can and can’t give. Support and believe in them. It’s either you’re their number one fan or you’re not!
There have been a lot of stereotypes when it comes to flirting, dating or being in a relationship with a musician. I, for one, have to admit that I’ve set a rule on not to date one. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’m judging them. In fact, I have a lot of friends who are actually musicians and I love them very much. But on another note, there are really some red flags.
And I’m sorry for saying this. But I know I’m not alone in this one. Musicians have this impression to be the ones who’ll swoon you with their amazing talent and magnetic charisma… Would make you head over heels only to realize, that you’re not so special to them. Yes, I know a lot who does this. Not that I’m judging. It just makes me afraid.
And like I’ve said, musicians get to meet a lot of people. A lot of new attractive faces, and perhaps I’m not that strong enough to deal with my insecurities and the probability that they’ll meet someone better, more interesting, and someone more musically inclined as compared to me.
Again, I’m not judging. I know a lot of musicians (girls and guys alike) who are very faithful and wouldn’t play with your feelings. But hey, it’s just my personal rule not to date one. No one’s stopping you! As long as you can be as strong as the individuals I know who are dating a musician, then why not, right?